Confession #25: Things I Learned from my 5-Year-Old

While watching, talking, listening, and teaching my kid every now and then I actual learn something!

Lesson #1:

Don't stand around waiting for an apology and don't ask for one either; because you'll NEVER get one!

Lesson #2:

Always try and use humor to diffuse anger.

Lesson #3:
When in doubt, apologize but have two or three things to be apologetic for in case you are quizzed.

Lesson#4:

Saying "I Love You" is a good way to test the waters if I have recently been in trouble. Depending on the tone of voice and the response I receive, I can determine if I still am...

Lesson #5:

Standing there crying with real tears exclaiming that I don't want to do a particular task will either get me what I want or get me in trouble. Either way the odds are in my favor.

Lesson #6:
If I don't use it too often (or use it A LOT), I can use guilt to make others play with me.

Lesson #7:

I can have at least some (if not all) of what someone is drinking as long as I drink first and ask afterwards. This usually results in my having the complete contents of the drink (especially if it's dad's drink).

Lesson #8:

If I believe I have been real good all day (and I actually have) I can ask for a small to medium treat or prize and 9 times out of 10 I will receive it!

Lesson #9:

I can keep talking and talking, and eventually something I say will either make sense, be profound, or be funny...sometimes a combination of all three!

Well, I guess that's all that I've learned so far this year. This now means I am ready for school...so I can tell the teacher how smart I am and how much I don't really need her.... hmmm...